DO I JUST MIND MY OWN BUSINESS?


The story you’re about to read is Christian’s but not about Christian. Chris is 15, he stays in Victoria Island, Lagos and he's the last child in a family of 3 – He has an elder sister (or eldest, if you like), and an immediate elder brother; 21 and 19 respectively. They are from the eastern part of Nigeria and they are well-to-do. (You can rightly guess of course; Judging from the part of Lagos they chose to stay).

The family is a strictly nuclear family, without open doors to any uncles, aunts, cousins, nieces, or nephews – oh except the house maid (don’t shift your eyebrows just yet). The said house help doesn’t stay in the premises though; Chris’s dad rented a small room self-contain for her, just down the street. Probably, because of stories he has heard about house helps and the children of their employers.

According Chris, he hoped the maid was living with them though, ‘cos at least, he probably would have someone to talk to and not bear the burden all alone ‘cos he’s indeed in a dilemma. Here’s where the story gets a little bit twisted.

Four years ago, precisely on the morning of Chris’s 10th birthday, around 5am, he had gone to ease himself and on his way back to his own room, an unusual sound from his brother’s room suddenly caught his attention. He shrugged and thought he was probably playing his video games or something.

But something stirred his curiosity and he turned, made his way into his brother’s room and switched on the light. Lo and Behold, Joseph and Emmanuella (his siblings) were stark naked, doing what he had only seen flashes of, on TV. They quickly covered themselves up and Joseph shouted at him to GET OUT! and close the door.

He was really confused and as he journeyed back to his bedroom, he kept trying to wrap his head around what he saw. He couldn’t quite confirm if it was his imagination or he indeed saw what he thought he saw. Joseph got him a PSP as his birthday present and confirmed it was not his imagination, by telling him not to tell anyone what he saw, or he’ll collect the PSP back.

Oh well, who cares what he saw? – Is he even sure what he saw? Please just leave matter for martyrs and let him enjoy his gaming device. Emmanuella on the other hand never said anything to him about it and even though on like 5 other occasions, spread over the space of 4 years, he’d heard similar noises from his brother’s room, he never gathered enough courage to walk towards the door, let alone opening it.

Last week was his 15th birthday and Joseph, who recently gained admission into University of Lagos had promised to wake him by pouring messy water on him. Hence, his plan was to wake up early and burst his elder bro's plans before he executes them. He woke up early as planned and quickly made his way to his brother’s room but just Like Déjà vu, he simply burst in to meet his siblings in the same shameful naked position, as four years ago, having a time of their lives.

This time, he didn't wait to be shouted on. He rushed back out immediately in tears. What he saw didn't only ruin his day, but it left him with a lot of unanswered questions. Questions like: “How come for all these years, his parents haven’t noticed anything?” “How long exactly have his siblings been this disgusting?” “Should he tell his parents?” “What if they don’t believe him?” “Should he just leave them and mind his own business?”

Right now, he’s really confused with no clear path to take about the matter in sight.

So dear reader, what would you suggest Chris does?


What do you think?


Mature Minds Talk.

Do you have any story, situation or questions you’ll like readers to weigh in on? Kindly send a mail to maturemindstalk@gmail.com

Thanks.
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MMT / WCW - TOPE ALABI

Hello Guys,
I’m so excited because it’s our first Woman Crush Wednesday - WCM on MMT and for those of us who’ve been living under a cave (*shade*), It simply means we’ll be picking out a female celebrity and celebrating them (Lol!). We’ll also be delving into a bit of their profile, and stating a few reasons why we love them as much as we do. So, straight to bi’ness (Yeup!).

**********

Our first WCW on MMT is no other person than the multiple award winner and multi-platinum singer – Tope Alabi. *Yaay!*

Let’s do you the favour of bringing you closer to her, just so you know why we love her so much (to make her the pioneer WCW on MMT).

Patricia Temitope Alabi, the only daughter of 3 children, was born on the 27th October, 1970 in Lagos State, Nigeria. She hails from Ogun state; Yewa, Imeko precisely. She schooled in Ibadan, after which she proceeded to obtain a degree in Mass Communication at The Polytechnic, Ibadan and graduated in the year 1990. (the name of that Polytechnic though)... Moving on.

Tope Alabi pursued her educational attainment with all seriousness and dedication it deserves because her parents were disciplinarians of the highest order. She however opted to join “The Jesters International” (Jacob, Papilolo & Aderupoko) during her secondary school days, between 1982 and 1984. Mainly because of her passion for music and drama.

After her graduation, she worked as a correspondent for NTA Ibadan, before moving to Lagos between 1990 and 1991, where she worked at NTA Channel 7 Tejuosho (Now NTA Channel 10, Lagos) between. She worked with Centrespread Advertising Limited, Ilupeju, Lagos; and a few other outfits. In 1994, she joined “Aromire Theatre Group” and used that as her much needed come back into the Theater Art profession.

That decision turned out to be one of her best decisions, as she was able to distinguish herself as a musician and actress. From then on, it has been from one step to another without looking back. She was (still has been) involved in various film productions, stage drama and most importantly the soundtrack production with which she was well known and considered as an authority in the Nigeria Yoruba Movie industry.

Tope Alabi is considered by many as the biggest gospel musician in Nigeria, with her songs been recycled, year after year. It be noteworthy to state that Tope Alabi is the pacesetter of soundtracks in the Yoruba Home Video Industry. She has to her credit to date, about 400 soundtracks which she had composed for various Yoruba movies. She also has 5 music albums to her credit and over 50 tracks.

Her hit tracks include… All her songs are hits jhor!

She’s probably the most heard voice on Instagram, as her song “Aye Le” has been used in over 300 funny Instagram skits – some of which aren’t even done by Nigerians.

So that’s it for our WCW guys, next time you hear “Aye Le” on Instagram, just know that lady up there contributed in making you laugh.

Can you guess who our next WCW would be?

Here's the popular "Aye Le" video:




Cheers.



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WHAT DO YOU WANT?

So, I was in an eatery some time ago, when a gentleman walked in. It was lunch hour, so there were quite a number of customers in front of the counter. Although there wasn’t a line, the attendants were trying really hard to ensure every customer was being attended to in time.

This gentleman strolls to the counter, places his left elbow on the counter, stands sideways with his right hand in his pocket and lets out a nice smile. He had such charisma, you would think he probably owned the place.

“So what would you like for lunch sir?” A light skinned lady asked, holding an empty plate in her left hand.

“Hmmm… what do you have?” He replied with his charming smile.

“Anything you can think of for lunch… or here, just go through the menu” the lady replied pointing upwards. Apparently, there was the menu board, tagged to the top of the counter.

“You know what?... I’m too hungry to start racking my brain about the menu. Just give me anything”
Without saying a word, the lady took the next person’s order, then the next person, then the next. The man had at this time removed his phone from his pocket and was scrolling through

“This man isn’t hungry at all. He should just leave the counter for other hungry folks” I thought like it’s any of my business. I was almost done with my own meal.

Hardly had I finished poke-nosing that the man raised his face.

“What the hell is this?!... What’s wrong with you people?!... I’ve literally been standing here for 20 minutes! Is this how you treat your customers?! Is there a manager I can speak to?!...”

The man went from 0 – 100 real quick. From Charming smile to “Where’s my food?!” in millisecond (Oh… so he was actually hungry. Lol!)

You see most of us in life are just like this man. We get to the counter and rather than place a specific demand, we demand for anything. Then we get worked up and frustrated when we try to get anything and we get nothing.

If only we could look around with insight and realize life sometimes flashes the question – WHAT DO YOU WANT?

Most of us have replies that sound like:

“I want to make it” – Make what? Tea?

“I want to be very rich” – Really? Can I give you N200? (You’ll be N200 richer than before)

“I want to get to the top” – Top of which tree?

“I want to be blessed” – Are you fellowshipping for the first time?

Our subconscious, which connects to the forces in the universe and controls a lot in the process of goal setting and goal getting, doesn’t actually understand vaguely set goals. Replies like those above result to NOTHING (apologies about the “blessing” part but it’s the truth).

When setting goals, let’s make it definitive and time bound. Let’s put specifics on it and give it a deadline. How about replies like:

“I’ll make products that sell for N20k upwards before the next six months”

“I want to make N5M profit by 31/12/2017”

“I want to buy a new car before the end of next month”

“I want to be the MD of my workplace by March 2019”

You’ll realize that goals set this way becomes clearer to work with; hence, faster to accomplish. Set the goals before you focus on the “How”. You’ll start to see opportunities where you previously haven’t seen anything, or have seen just problems. Have your answer ready ‘cos life can at any time ask you the question: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAYBEE

I've learnt quite a number of lessons in this my one life I've lived (especially between last year and now). Some of which I shared with my virtual family on Facebook, via a platform called Showmanship. I was the Showman, and I'll quickly just share with us some of the things I shared here. 

I think everyone should know and keep these points in mind, to make life's journey one with less friction. I'll be reminding myself these 7 points as often as I can. You may want to try it too. Here we go:

1. Never think "those" previous years are wasted or insignificant. The years past are what have summed up to form your moulding blocks, and you wouldn't be where you are now, without being there first.

2. You are exactly where God wants you to be. Don't look at another person's time and start turning the hands of your clock. We all are operating in our individually unique timezone. Obama left office at 55, Trump entered at 70 - Different timezone.

3. Have an attitude of Thankful reflection. There is something to learn from every experience you go through in life. If you can't find the good in that seemingly bad experience, then just know that however bad, it could have been worse.

4. Everyone has what they've been through in the past, that has formed the basis of how they think and act presently. Rather than judge people based on their actions, why not take time to understand them and know why they act the way they do.

5. Nobody owes you anything. Whatever you want out of life should be demanded by you. Life is not fair and you cannot bleach it. You don't expect anyone to give you anything. You need go get whatever you want,

6. Amoshine when Amoshine, and you gon shine when you gon shine. If your neighbour is shining, then be happy cos it's his time to shine. Don't be envious or turn to a "poke-nosa" (Lol!). When your time comes, people will have to wear shades to look at you - "Your Time".

7. Find your domain and dominate it. Whales are not expected to dominate the sky and eagles will die if they decide to compete in Aquatic Animals Olympics. Find YOUR anchor and destroy YOUR dungeon. That way achievement comes without stress.

Meanwhile, Jaybee, I wish you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Long Life and prosperity in good health, clean joyful wealth and overflowing peace. May every door you approach automatically open (yes, like motion sensor doors). God bless you today, tomorrow, and forever for the rest of your life.

Go put a dent on the universe you super powered weirdo!

Have fun and enjoy a great one.


Cheers!
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HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY


Happy Valentine's Day everyone, may this day bring us more of not only love, but peace, happiness, tolerance, and understanding. May our relationships continue to get better, stronger, and like the wine, get sweeter with as time goes by. Cheers!

*Wears mischievous sunshades*

The couple's greeting has ended - Continue reading at your own discretion. because from here downwards isn't the general Happy Valentine's Day shoutout.

Happy Valentine's Day to all the single peeps out there, who are of age, but have refused to be pressured into going into a relationship by friends, colleagues, relatives, and even parents. We deserve the best when we eventually find someone who we want to settle with - Life would agree with us.

Happy Valentine's to all those who have lost their partners. If we decide to remain single in their honour, then we have done the right thing and it simply indicates how strong our love was, when we had them around. If we also decide to go into a relationship, may life give us someone who would do far much better than our departed partner.

Happy Valentine's to all single parents out their who have been abandoned by their partners or supposed partners. If we are sure we truly did nothing wrong, then it's just a matter of time before true love finds us. Earth's law of getting what we give is sure to reward us with the love that will make us rise above our present state.

Finally, Happy Valentine's Day to all the guys/girls who are in relationships to test the waters, and never giving it their all. When our heart is broken, we'll say all men are scum or all women are trash. We won't confess how we were doing like Wi-Fi signal bar, rising and falling all through the relationship. We easily forget that relationships take testing the waters with both feet.

May we change from today and enjoy true love... and if it turns bad, may we have enough strength to dust ourselves and move on.

Happy Valentine Everyone.

Did I miss out any category (Lol!), kindly notify me in the comment section below.


Cheers!



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THE CRYPT - INTRO


From Generations to Generations,

From Clans to Clans,

The War has waged on with no end in sight.

The brotherhood of Darkness and all its cohorts,

Watches us closely with prying eyes.

Sharpening their weapons - the old tools,

The Grim reaper, boogie man, weeping widow, and other ancient fools.

Dying to see what against their forces, the force of light can do.

The time is almost upon us, you knights of day.

Night draws closer, the implications are needless to say.

Gather your weapons, we go to war again.

For the sake of earth, we need to keep the dark force at bay.

*Weapons Clanging, Knights Roaring*

This time, we take the war to them, else at our doorsteps they deliver mayhem!

This time they taste the wrath of our flames from the edge of our blades!

This time our strikes are mortal, and finally for good we shut the portal!

This time we bring terror and fear to the gates!

It is time warriors!


WELCOME TO THE GATE OF THE CRYPT !!!
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HELP! THE WEIGHT OF THIS SECRET IS KILLING ME

What you’re about to read is the true life of Anna (not real name) from Lagos. I’m sure some of us have heard this story, and for those of us who haven’t, we could adequately use this opportunity to weigh in and share our thoughts. This is one of most complicated stories I've heard in long while. If you can, disengage from any form of distraction and read through.

********

Anna had been dating Sam for over five years and it was no more a thing of doubt that they saw a future together. They had already started making plans for their future, and how life would be, after they tie the knot. But things were starting to get dry and grainy, and a lot of things in their relationship were beginning to get affected. Sometimes, these things come as partners grow older.

It seemed the relationship was heading for the rocks, as they were arguing over anything and everything. Sam decided they needed a break and this was in the summer of 19**. They went their separate ways, during which Anna met Charles. She had a stint of a rebound relationship with Charles during the summer, an action which brought her to the realization that she just can’t love anybody the way she loves Sam.

Summer ended and she just couldn’t wait to be back in the arms of her Sam. Little did she know that Sam missed her even more. Two week later, he popped “The Question” and before one thing could or couldn’t lead to the other, they tied the knot... But a day to the wedding, Anna discovered something that made her pass out.

She was feeling funny and she conducted one of the available pregnancy tests just to check. Alas! She was pregnant. Pregnant with Charles’s baby, just before getting married to the love of her life. What would she do? Who does she turn to? How would Sam take it? This surely means the end of the wedding and the start of a whole new sudden difficult life for her – It was just a short summer!

She decides to keep mute, went ahead with the wedding and she delivered a bouncing baby girl – the first child of the family. Innocent Sam of course thought the baby was his. Anna decides she was going to tell her husband just after her post natal, but her courage failed her. She had on many occasions decided to tell, either her husband, her daughter, or call both of them and confess but she had never been able to gather enough courage.

21 years went by and she is still yet to tell anyone. She was going to tell her daughter on her 15th birthday but she couldn’t, she was going to tell her on her 16th birthday but she couldn’t, on her 20th birthday, but she couldn’t, on her 21st, but it’s already 2 months after her 21st. No one knows who the true father of her first child is, except her.

 As a matter of fact, she’s still in touch with Charles on Facebook and even he doesn’t know that anything came from their summer stint together, and he indeed has a 21 year old child with her. No idea at all. He's married too and has his own family, thought they just keep in touch once in a while as old time pals.

The weight of the secret weighs heavily on Anna’s conscience, day after day and she’s really scared that something is going to happen soon that would blow it all open. She's also scared of what would happen if she decides to reveal the secret. How it would affect the life of her husband, her daughter, her other children, Charles, his kids and his family generally - In fact, it's a whole big mess.

 Definitely, a lot of innocent lives would be affected, should she decide to take away the bliss of all their ignorance. The weight is killing her though, and even though she had resolved to take the secret to the grave with her, she doesn't think she can go through with it.

The question now is: Should she summon courage and go down to the grave with her dirty secret, since she’s the only one that knows about it, or should she tell all the parties involved and brace herself for the tsunami of the consequences?
Have you ever been in a similar situation as Anna?
What would be your best piece of advice to someone in this situation?
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WHY AREN'T BANKERS THE RICHEST PEOPLE IN THE WORLD?

So, a couple of days ago, Felix (not real name) and I were having a conversation and he told me about his plight. I’ll like to share it with you; maybe there’s someone going through the same situation. Hopefully, this would serve as some sort of answer to get you dusted and moving on.

“I’m studying Microbiology presently but I don’t have one grain of passion for it. I love to write and writing is the number one thing that gives me joy. Sometimes, I lock myself away from the world and write away for hours. Nothing else can take that much of my time. I’m single now though, so I don’t know how it’ll be when I have a partner who’ll also need a portion of my time and attention.”

“That’s great!” I replied “As a writer myself, I love it when young minds say these things. It means that there are still very active sources, where positive energy is dispelled into the atmosphere and other writers can also tap from. Nice one bro!”

He then went quiet for one ‘very long’ minute, time long enough for me to know something was wrong.

“But I don’t think I want to write anymore. My friends are telling me to be serious and realistic with my life. They say writing is not a lucrative line and I can’t be as financially comfortable as I want to be. They said even though I’m a good writer, while my mates are working in banks, oil and gas firms, building & construction companies, health, insurance, and the rest, I’ll be scribbling words that people may not even read. Also they said…”

I allowed him finish his epistle and here’s my simple reply, which I’ll also like to give anybody having doubts about following their passion.

“Felix, do you know that if what you studied in school is directly proportional to your financial stability and sustainability, then Bankers should be the richest people in the world. I mean, this people sleep and wake up with money. They see, feel, and even dream about money. But do you know why bankers aren’t the richest people in the world?”

“Why?”

“Simply because 89% (my personal stat from close interaction, scrutiny and observation) of bankers don’t even know how they ended up there, what they’re doing there, or when they’ll leave there. Cash isn’t money to them but tools of their trade. Just so is it for people who have turned themselves into professional robots, cycling the routine, month-after-month, living for the pay day and nothing else.

The problem isn’t necessarily the tracks but the athletes. We live in a world where a lot of fishes are up in the sky, praying and yearning for water, and a lot of birds are deep down in the waters, drowning and gasping for air. A world where we’ve been made to believe that some professions are ants, when some others (elephants) are called.

There are a lot of people majestically seated behind large mahogany desks, who know deep down that they should busy dirtying themselves in their farms. There is that HR guy currently running a presentation, who knows even at that spot that he should be in his kitchen with his co-chefs, “cheffing” things out.

Felix, your friends, just like the society have lied! Look at people like John Grisham, Stephen King, James Patterson and Mummy J.K. Rowling and see the truth. Whatever it is you want to do, someone whose generation will forever be thankful to, has done it. Hope that answers your question”


And yes, Felix is Nigerian, so I totally understand where he’s coming from, but look at Late Isaac Durojaiye Agbetusin (SAN), aka Otunba Gaddaffi and his “Sh*t Business is Serious Business” slogan. His fellow legal practitioners would’ve thought he had mental hea…
…Enough said.



To every Felix out there, Go and turn your passion into profit, so you understand how it feels, being paid to do “nothing”.




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IS LOVE REALLY ENOUGH? - OPINION


Hey Guys,
Long time.

So, most of us caught wind of the viral photo of the young Kenyan couple that got married with just Ksh100 (just enough money to buy 2 rings).

In case you did not follow up on the story, a list of companies and individuals have indicated interest to sponsor a well organized wedding and honey moon for them. A business outfit have even offered to set up a business for the new wife (why the wife though?).

Thing is though; I personally don't think that love is not enough to sustain a marriage, and I'm not sure they gave their action a thorough think-through. I mean, there are some challenges/situations that would ask a couple, questions that love can't answer (only money can answer those questions).

It's not a bad thing that they decided to tie the knot after being totally sure about their love for each other, but would I be wrong to say they focused solely on love and discarded every other aspect of the marriage - Maturity, Stability, Capability, Sustainability, Independence, and so on?

The priest, rather than join them together could've counselled them not to be in a hurry but from some other people's perspective, they actually did the right thing. The man is 26, and the woman is 24 - An age many believed was ripe enough to get the green light.



But I think marriage (not wedding) doesn't really depend on the age you tie knot. It actually depends on your readiness and when you feel you're "indeed" up to the task to accept the responsibility of parenthood; because whether you like it or not, a third entity would soon be introduced into the equation. Then, you might realize that even though love conquereth all things, not everything needs conquering.

Some things just need answering, all you know what the good book said answereth all things.

Ok, enough of my "talkie talkie" - What do you guys think? Do you think it was right and wise for them to tie the knot, or it would've been better, had they waited and doubled their hustle (why did that sound awkward? Lol!)

Over to you.



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WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT THE AGOYIN?

Hmmm… Instagram

Sometimes, after the day’s work, most of which involves mental exercises, Instagram is one of the places I visit for stress relief. Thanks to accounts like Funny African Pix, Kraks HQ, & Twyse_116. Those are the ones I keep tabs with. Yes, I know there are a lot of them; both the funny ones and the desert dry ones. But who has time (no, not data) to be watching funny videos “upandan”?

I had seen different people with a funny pose of a Buddhist-like palm vertically (and strategically) placed in front of their faces. So on this fateful day, my mission on Instagram was different – I needed answers. Is there some “Asian flu”, “Religious brouhaha”, or what? It didn’t take long to find my answer – Falz the good guy (What’s bad about the guy abeg? Even his ‘Boda Taju’ accent is pretty good).

I found myself checking out different #WehdoneSir poses, and if like me you sometimes wander on the internet, you’ll understand the next turn of events – This is where things got really interesting – I clicked to check someone’s profile, from there, I checked someone else’s profile and I found myself watching a video of a lady eating bread and beans – ‘Hollup!’ Not just any bread and beans.

The ancient, ever green, irreplaceable, possessive, stress relieving Agege Bread featuring Ewa Agoyin (I believe this is one of the reasons Nigeria can never divide).

“Wow!... I like the fact that my complimentary delivery was neatly packaged and the meal is also delicious. Hmm… Thank you so much Agoyin Special. You just got yourself a customer”.

After watching her recite those words, I checked her video caption, saw a funny looking handle (@agoyinspecial) and the explorer in me continued – I clicked!

You see, we just might keep struggling until we can start seeing, when others are looking.
Your break wouldn’t necessarily come by invention. It would most likely come by innovation. “Find an idea that’s working around you, tweak it so much, people don’t know where it came from” – Wise words from a bright man.

My own remix of those words: …and even if you can’t tweak it too much, just rePACKAGE it and put it back in the market. The lady who buys fruits (apple, cucumber, pineapple, etc), takes it home, dices it and re-sells it in a neatly packaged takeaway pack as her branded Fruit Salad, hasn’t done much, except idealizing and rePACKAGING.

Back to the story: I found myself on an IG account of some official Agoyin sellers. The PACKAGING was top notch and they even have a website. Haa!... For the same Agoyin some women carry in the pot on my street every morning – PACKAGING. Nothing is special about their Agoyin, except you probably have to go to their website, place your order and your Agoyin is delivered like pizza.

Never underestimate the POP in any business you’re doing – I mean the Power Of Packaging.
PACKAGING sets your biz apart from the rest.


Cheers folks!



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WDYT - TOO MANY MALE FRIENDS


Hello Sir,

Compliments of the season to you. My name is Emmanuel. I am a Journalist and a newscaster. I’m happily married and I don’t have any issue per say, but here I am, still writing what might probably go live on your website, on any of these Friday's What Do You Think Series.

The thing is, my wife, who I’ve been married to for 3 years now, has too many friends. I wouldn’t have had any problem with that, or probably not as much problem with that as I have now, except these many friends are male friends. She has so many male friends to an extent that I feel is inappropriate for a married woman.

I’m not typically a jealous type but I must be very honest, this scenario, on several occasions test my ability to not be jealous. I don’t know how she came about them all but they’re always multiplying or something. I know she’s a marketer in her bank but I’m not sure if that is how every “married” female bank marketers have a congregation of male friends.

I wouldn’t want to say this whole scenario isn’t getting to me – at least, here I am writing a letter about it, but I just want to know what do to get along with the flow (even though I'll rather end it). She has always had a few male friends before we got married but it didn’t bother me then. From the childhood friend, the ex-school mate, the brother in the church, the colleague at work, the social media chat buddy, even to her phone repairer (like who the hell keep tabs with their phone repairers?!)

Many of them like that. Although one thing I'm very sure of is that she’s not cheating on me. Not because I sniff around for signs but because I trust my gut and she’s a terrible liar. So, I feel the moment she starts cheating, it won’t take long for me to know. But these her friends are something to write home about. Every time I bring it up, she says “when did it become a crime to have friends, whether as a single or married person?” She just seem oblivious of the point. 

I sound like I’m ranting but the thing is paining me because it’s slowly getting to a point where she’ll have to choose between us or her fans (as I call them). I don’t know if any of your readers are in any similar situation, and maybe they can help out with how to deal with situations like this. It’s frustrating and I’m really getting fed up.

What do you think I should do? Do I just look the other way and just be thankful that at least, she isn’t cheating, or do I put my foot down and tell her to be done with her male friends?... or is there any other better way to go about this?



Thank you.




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LIFE LESSON FROM A WASHING MACHINE

“The world we live in is full of infinite wisdom, and that’s why there’s always something to learn from every experience”
“However bad an experience may seem, always ask yourself – What is the good in this?”
- Wise words from a bright man.

Here is the story that y’all have been waiting for – Jaybee’s Washing Machine Saga. *inserts nollywood soundtrack*

So it happened sometime last week when I decided to do my laundry. I went to consult this same washing machine in question, with the few clothes I had to wash.

Amongst these clothes was one shirt – It was my most prized shirt. Simple Hawes and Curtis but relatively expensive (If it can pay for two nights in a standard hotel, Lol… Shebi e try?). I normally would wash it alone but I guess I was just in life’s classroom that day.

I tumbled the clothes into the machine and set the timer. The clothes began to spin. “Na here the story con tie wrapper” (local parlance… If you don't know, ask someone for the meaning). As I turned to go, I saw my little face towel lying helplessly on the chair not too far. It practically looked like it was crying “I’m dirty too”

“I have enough clothes in there already” I thought… Then I thought again “What harm can a small face towel do?” and on I went, picked up the evil thing (you’ll understand later) and flung it into the machine. (I would later learn that I shouldn’t have done that).

You see, this year, while we have expensive ideas, brilliant charisma, outstanding character, and all sorts, we must be very protective of who we roll with... or who rolls with us. It’s too late for us to be NOBODY, hence, we are not allowed to roll with EVERYBODY. A large chunk of who you become tomorrow is as a result of who you choose to associate yourself with today.

What happened after the machine stopped spinning. I opened the lid and my heart skipped two beats. My white shirt had turned bright yellow – No thanks to the snaky face towel that decided to shed its skin in the water. My shirt was ruined!

N70 face towel!... Hawes and Curtis! (It kept playing in my head like a new single... Lol!)

I felt bad, but then it got me thinking about life. The washing machine could simply signify our schools, churches, offices, shops, and any other place we can’t but mingle with people. Face towels would always try to get to our Hawes and Curtis (they will. Trust me). This is a very risky situation, because these people don’t know jack but they act like they are paid special advisers.

Face towels don’t know, and they don’t know that they don’t know. Even when they are made to realize they don’t know, they still take glory and majesty in their ignorance. When you spot face towels trying to influence your Hawes and Curtis ideas (trust me, they can be quick influencers too), don’t ponder on what to do abeg. Just SWERVE!

This year, face towels will come as friends, relatives, brethren and "Sistren"(excuse my french) just anyone. Sharpen your insight and you’ll see them. Those who can’t see us past where we are now, let alone where we’re head. The "Now" people with no foresight. Jack of all trades, master of nada! Always looking for who to counsel.

Please, biko, dan’allah, ejo, mbok, let us not roll with face towels in 2017 if we value our Hawes and Curtis. (Ko le werk... It wee nur work).


Thank You.


p.s: Hypo di nur change back di colour o! (Lol!)... Any suggestions?



Mature Minds Talk.
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WDYT - I DON'T KNOW IF I'M A SINGLE MUM

Hello,

How are you doing?

I’ve been following your Friday What Do You Think Series, and even I’ve dropped a comment or two when I could – I’m not really someone to share my personal issues but I would, this one, ‘cos I’ve sincerely had it up to here.

I’ll really appreciate it if I can get an opinion or two from mature minds, like the name of your website indicates.

My name is Danielle (name changed) and I’m 31 years old. I stay in Lagos with my husband of three years and I must say this year, 2016 has been the most tedious year for us and our kid. I met my husband in February 2011 a few months before he travelled to the UK, for his masters. He is smart, hardworking and loving. In short, my dream man.

After he came back to Nigeria in December 2012, he got a handsomely paying job with an Oil and Gas Company and we got married a couple of months later – February 2013, precisely. I was three months gone as at then. I also got a job at a bank and I must say the beginning of our marriage was the one of my dreams.

March 2014, was when all the problems started. The company underwent their useless needed restructuring and my husband got laid off. We were undertaking a personal project when this happened and saying the occurrence hit him hard is an extreme understatement. It took him a couple of months to start eating well, and to go back to his jovial and normal self.

It was depressing but I thank God, he didn’t slip into depression. He got another job three months later but resigned a couple of months later. He got another job with one of my uncle’s friends, just a month later but that also lasted a few months – he resigned. My uncle told me his friend told him he always acted like he wasn’t supposed to be there, and it badly affected his delivery.

Since then, he hadn’t even bothered getting another job. I’ve been the one shouldering the responsibility of the family, the best and most humble way I can. All he’s done is gone for a couple of interviews and nothing else after that. All pleas for him to start something on the side while the search goes on has fallen on deaf ears.

I haven’t really made much of a big deal about this, except occasional arguments when I feel the weight of it all on my shoulders. And oh, asides from being a banker, I’m also a make-up artist. One thing I’ve tried to avoid whenever we argue is bring his career status into it. The economic recession this year changed all that. It was too much for me. I had times when I broke down crying when alone.

I almost don’t have anything to show in my savings account because I always made it seem he’s the one doing everything. The recession (probably not), made us argue almost every day. But I’m always quick to apologize and come back to my senses that I can’t argue or fight with the head of my home.

A month ago, he left the house for days and after much searching, I found out he’s been drinking and smoking, and going to brothels. I almost ran mad. We’ve not spoken since then ‘cos I also angrily left the house with my daughter to my friend’s.

I sincerely don’t know what to do – Whether it’s to plead with him to forgive me for… (I don’t know) or just leave him to enjoy himself. Or… I don’t know – I’m heartbroken. I do my best to keep our secrets secret but this is all I get in return. I don’t know what to do and asides the fact I feel like a single mum, I still love him and don’t want to lose him.


I’ll also like to know your opinion on this issue.



Thanks a lot and have a Merry Christmas in advance.




Danielle.




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